1. I am getting close to the time my kids will know the difference between $19.99 gift and $39.99 gift.


  1. I wonder when is the time my kids will be embarrassed from getting mind games.


  1. I have twins and I failed in my calculations and bought one of them one more gift than the other. I guess counting on him to nurture me when I am old is out of the question.


  1. I wonder if Chang from China worked double shift before Christmas for $1.36 per hour so I can buy my kid the new $49.99 Star Wars toy which he is going to throw away after 12.5 minutes.


  1. I wanted to be patriotic and buy my child “made in USA” gift but the factory closed last month.


  1. I suggested to put name sticker on each family member since some of them I see once every 5 years on Christmas. They didn’t like the idea.


  1. You are trying desperately to keep on fooling your kids there is Santa. “One gift from me and one from Santa”. They are not going to give up on the Santa’s gifts so easily. There comes a time from which they fool you to think that they think there is Santa. “Daddy, can you leave some carrots for the reindeers? They will probably be tired running so many miles with my Xbox”


  1. The average age a child understands there is no Santa went down from 10 years old in 2004 to 5.5 years old in 2015. With that rate by 2025 they will be born knowing there is no Santa. Come up with a backup plan.


  1. According to my calculations I spent $325 on gifts and received $280 gifts. I tried to sell them as used items and got $150. That means my Net Loss from this Christmas is $175. I knew I shouldn’t have bought this Artistic Chess case that is hand made especially for me and other 3 million people.


  1. 364 days a year I preach to my kids that life is not about money and materialistic possessions. On Christmas, while sitting in front of their gifts mountain, they understand I was a cheap liar.

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